It's all inside

This fortune I got in my cookie really speaks to me, most fortune's that I get I don't understand fully, or they are just plain stupid. But this one, this one is different. This is the fortune I've been waiting my whole life to get. The one that say's "you can do it, you CAN succeed." So how about you just sit back and relax while I make a name for myself, while I do the impossible, while I overcome all odds to be who I want to be. Because really, that's my main goal in life. To be who I want to be. To dress how I want to dress, to think how I want to think, to be anything my heart desires.

the poet

you look at her, then you look at me, i ask you now, which one of us do you see? because all i see is you, and i want you to follow through. i love you so dearly, but it's not the end of the world, believe it or not, no matter what you've been told. your words are soft, just like your skin, i live this in this moment, just to see your grin.

OMG :D

HAPPIEST DAY OF MY LIFE.

I'm not sure

I'm not sure about anything anymore.
I have a wonderful boyfriend, who treats me better than anyone on earth,
but I can't stop from wondering what would have happened if I had said yes last summer.
Okay okay okay, you are all REALLY fucking sick of hearing me talk about this I know that,
but I need to get it off my chest and out of my head somehow, and writing it down where my brother can read it really won't help.
I miss the old days.
I mean the really old days,
when we were all little kids,
and none of this bullshit mattered.
I would have run away from you both because of the fear of being infested with cooties.
But now I have real shit to sort out,
priorities to get straight,
and a head that can't hold any of this because of all the other shit that's going on.
Please just let me forget about you, as hard as that may be,
let me forget that there may possibly be something in store for us in the far away future,
please let me forget that we have a history.

I just want to be happy..

You Were Worth Every Mile

I would have walked those 2,289 miles in a heartbeat.
I would have spent every cent I had just to get to you.
But my heart would have broken even harder if I had.
I would have knocked on your door,
only to find him, standing there, and as soon as words came out of his mouth,
I would have fallen to the ground and died.
I wish I had never done that three way call.
I wish I could still have the sweet memories of you,
i wish those texts I have saved on my phone really came from you..
Tieler Austin Sharp does not exist.
The love I have for him, does not exist.
So what the fuck am I feeling?

sorry

I only want one person to save me..
And your not him.

I've wasted so much precious time on you,
and now I'm paying for it.
I had to watch you go through an eleven month relationship,
while i was still madly in love with you.
Now I have to watch you go through yet another relationship..
while I'm in one too.

What do I do?
I'm obviously not over you,
I still love you with all of my heart,
and everytime I see you I just want to grab you and kiss you forever.

But it will never happen.
I blew it faster than a whore,
and now I'm stuck playing this stupid waiting game,
waiting for you to hopefully realize that you want me,
that you need me, that you have to have me,
like I have to have you..

21

1)Do you ever wonder what your ex is up to?
nope

2)Have u ever been given​ roses​?​
no ):

3)What is your all time favourite romance movie?
TITANICCCCC!

4)Had a Long Distance Relationship?​​
ugggggh, sadly yes.
NEVER DATE SOMEONE YOU'VE NEVER MET.

5)Do you believe in this saying-​what goes around comes​ around?
sometimes

6)Do you want to get married?​​
yes

7)How many kids do you want to have?​
one or two

8)Whats​ your favorite color​(​s)​​?​​
turquoise

9)Who was the last person you held hands​ with?​
my boyfrieeendd (:

10)Do you believe in love at first​ sight​?​​
sometimes

11)Would​ you kiss the last person you kissed again​?​​
durrr

12)At what age did you start​ noticing the opposite gender?​​
like 5 hahah

13)Do you like anyone?​
BOYFRIEND, "yeah dug dummie"
hahahah

14)Do you know someone who likes​ you?
yes

15)Do you love anyone?​​
family and friends

16)Do they know you like/​love them?​​
yes

17)Why did you and your most recent ex break​ up?
because i didn't have sex with him.
hahaha, yeah true story.

18)When did you two last speak​ to one anoth​er?​
like a month or two ago

19)Would​ you get back together with your ex?
NO

20)What comes​ to your mind when you think​ of love?
something..that i'm not going to say.. :|

21)Is there anyone that knows you inside out?
hayley!

After a year and a half...

After a year and a half i'm finally back at school. I started this year in a program at Juanita High called Futures. The staff there are AMAZING, my dean of students pulled me out of class today and said, "If you ever feel too overwhelmed or are just not doing well, feel free to raise your hand and you can leave the class." So no more missing full days of school for my bipolar or depression, anxiety or voices. Everything is finally falling into place, I love it. My job is going great (I get paid on my birthday! Which is friday by the way :D) So far I havn't met any boys that strike my fancccyyy, but i have someone in mind from before anyways (: